In the blink of an eye

It’s as though I closed my eyes for a second and woke up two weeks later. I feel like I returned to the U.S. yesterday, and years ago at the same time. On the last night the participants of the GYPA Global Kimeeza were in Uganda we had a reflection session where I gave them words of advice and preparation for the reverse culture shock and adjustment that they would face upon returning home. I gave these words with confidence backed by ample experience.

Is there really any way to prepare for it? I suppose readjusting hasn’t been as difficult this time as it has been in the past. I am aware of what the possible feelings and emotions are, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that feeling those things becomes any easier, it just means I am able to identify. I am almost able to trust that this too shall pass.

Last week all I had was time. What did I do? I thought. I thought and thought and I thought about how I should be writing my thoughts, but I couldn’t pick up a pen or type anything on my computer. Why? Maybe the first difficult part of readjusting back to life in America is the inability to articulate your thoughts. Everything you think and feel is too deep, too profound, too overwhelming, words don’t begin to describe, they just can’t.

Maybe it is the “European linguistic poverty” that Ryszard Kapscinski writes about in “The Shadow of the Sun”. Our languages have developed to describe or explain our worlds. Adequate language to describe non-European (or American) worlds simply does not exist leaving “Entire areas of African life…unfathomed, untouched even”. Maybe I cannot write about my experiences in Africa as they actually were because I have always subconsciously recognized that, as Kapscinski continues, “The richness of every European language is a richness in ability to describe its own culture, represent its own world. When it ventures to do the same for another culture, however, it betrays its limitations, underdevelopment, semantic weakness”. I agree. I don’t know.

During my last weeks, last days in particular, in Uganda, I was firmly committed to what I was working on, namely identifying and implementing solutions to some of GYPA’s organizational challenges and getting One Mango Tree off the ground in the U.S. I was very conscious, while there, of how easy it is, upon returning home, to let the physical distance translate into emotional and intellectual disconnect between oneself and those left behind in Uganda and the issues you were just immersed in. Technology, while it does make the world of communications smaller, does not necessarily fill the void of distance. Two eight-hour airplane rides and two weeks time and I feel worlds apart from the people and the places that I am committed to working alongside. Trying to figure out how that works, how such working and emotional relationships can operate, is one of the more exhausting challenges of being home or being anywhere for that matter. Such are the long-term challenges of being, of feeling apart from what you are connected with.

Then there are the moments. There are two different kinds of moments I’ve been experiencing.

The first, and the kind that I experienced the most in the first few days home, are the moments where, despite how easily I blend right back into my day-to-day life in DC, I am struck by how different life here is. My old routine was to wake up, shower, eat breakfast, walk 10 minutes down the clean and clearly named streets of Capitol Hill to Union Station, get on the metro, and go to the office. The first few days I was back I would stand there and watch the metro approach, it’s lights flashing, horn blaring, and then the mechanical voice would announce that the doors were opening, closing, “next stop is...”… In such moments I would become acutely aware of just how unfathomable this phenomenon would be to regular Ugandan citizen. I think of movies that show the future – car-type things on the sides of buildings, flying cars, floating homes, stores that speak to the customer’s thoughts and feelings as they walk in etc. That is how the metro system would appear to many people in Africa. In this regard, America really is a different world, or at least the same world 100 years into the future. Thinking of how I would explain the metro system to a Ugandan and imagining some of their responses or questions, which I know would make most American’s laugh, I then think of the reversed situation. “How was Africa?” “There’s a lot of poverty there huh?” “Does everyone live in mud huts?” How do you explain to an American how unrealistic most of our perceptions are of African countries, of African people? Africa is just as unfathomable to the average American. How do you really bridge these divides? These are thoughts that come in waves, in moments, and less frequently with time. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

The second kind of moment, the less intellectual kind, the more spiritual, deeper, more refreshing, more uplifting and depressing at the same time moments. For those of you who watch Grey’s Anatomy, in a recent episode Meredith Grey dies, or at least goes to a place of limbo, where she sees Denny, the love of Izzy’s life (Izzy = friend of Meredith) who dies tragically just after proposing marriage. In this place of limbo, Denny tells Meredith that there are moments when he is walking around in the hospital (in limbo land) and he suddenly feels Izzy’s presence, he knows that she is in that exact same place in the hospital (in the earthly world) as he is. Those moments are what keep him going. At the end of the episode you see Izzy walking through the hospital and she stops and smiles, and you know that she is feeling Denny’s presence in that moment.

Moments where the world around you ceases to exist, you feel something else, you are somewhere else entirely. I don’t feel an individual person’s presence, but the moments are like that…

In the spirit of lent I am trying not to use public transportation during daylight hours. This means that after my run, which I am trying to do in the mornings, I walk to work, I walk to meetings, happy hours and everywhere I would normally metro to. Walking is giving me extra time to connect to where I am, to my thoughts, and it’s giving me moments where I connect to where I am IN my thoughts. As I walk past the capitol building and towards the Washington monument on my way to the office – one moment I am captivated by the environment’s beauty and aura of power, and I have so many questions about where I am, what I am doing here… the next moment I’m walking down the dusty streets of Gulu or I am breathing in the rich air of the Indian Ocean on the coast of Kenya. In those moments I am happy, and when it passes I have even more questions about where I am, what I am doing here, what I would be doing there, where am I going?

Uplifting…and depressing at the same time – such is the roller coast ride of choosing a life that continually gives you roots in a place and then uproots you, and moves you, again, and again, and again. It is a choice and not a choice at the same time – because it’s your decision, and yet deciding anything otherwise is impossible because it leaves you restless and unfulfilled. Yet choosing this lifestyle still leaves you restless and unfulfilled because you are always moving and wondering what is next and whatever is next never feels like quite enough.

Reflecting on my role with GYPA

Brooke Jordan, a participant on this past January's Global Kimeeza II asked me to write a bit about what I am doing with GYPA, why I am doing it, what inspires me etc. It turned into a bit of a journal (or blog) entry. Since anyone who reads this is reading it because they are intersted in what I'm doing, what my thoughts are... I thought I'd share it here as well...


I have always been devoted to issues in Africa – development, health, peace & conflict resolution. When I was young I was inexplicably intrigued by all things Africa. Four years ago I took my first trip to the continent and there was no turning back after that. I caught “the Africa bug”, which seems to spread to most people who go to Africa, it enters their blood, changes who they are and the way they think about life, and from that point on they will always have the restless yearning that eventually lands them back on the continent.

My studies and my career aspirations have been and continue to be largely geared around grassroots development. I still have not figured out exactly where my passion and skills fit into the international development/public health/conflict resolution spheres, but I have figured out an important role that I can play while I try to sort out the rest. In my personal experience, my first trip to Africa, my first real exposure to the reality on the ground, was the catalyst for every action I have taken since that time. I gained connections, insight, and inspiration that have been a driving force in my life.

Through working for the Global Youth Partnership for Africa (GYPA), I have been able to offer the option of such an experience to other youth. GYPA trips have the ultimate purpose of cultivating globally conscious youth – a generation that is informed, aware, and connected to one another. We offer exposure to the issues and realities on the ground in African countries (Uganda, Sierra Leone, and soon Cameroon). By connecting American and African youth to each other, government leaders, NGO leaders, academics and activists, GYPA creates a network that serves and will continue to serve as a platform for effective communication, sharing of knowledge and resources, and the creation of new opportunities.

In January I lead my first trip to Uganda. The theme of the program was “The Role of Youth in Post-Conflict Northern Uganda”. We had 13 American participants and 26 Ugandans (from Kampala and Gulu). Watching the participants interact, share and learn from one another was well worth all of the hard work that went into the program’s creation. I was able to watch as many of the American participants caught the “Africa Bug” that I caught 4 years ago. It’s like watching lights go on in someone’s eyes – when they suddenly discover parts of themselves and parts of the world that they never knew existed and they see a role that they can play – a purpose.

There are two potential levels of impact that occur as a result of GYPA trips. The first is the immediate, personal transformation – the process of catching what I’ve been calling the Africa Bug. Whether it is apparent at the time or not, every participant’s perception of the world changes - shifts in some way, shape, or form and for most, this shift is life changing.

The second level of impact can be seen in what happens after the trip. Personal transformation has led our participants to do incredible things with their time and energy – with their lives. The majority of GYPA alumni have become advocates and activists for Africa. Many maintain the connections that they made while on the trip and join together to fundraise, create projects, movements etc. An amazing number go back to Africa, either the country we brought them to or to another place. The ripple effects of the initial GYPA experience is proof that GYPA staff and alumni are creating a new and important network of globally conscious citizens.

Being able to devote my time to facilitate or support that cataclysmic experience or moment that transforms an individual from someone curious about Africa, curious about their own self-potential, into a dedicated and passionate advocate for a more just world with a greater sense of who they are and what they believe in, is a great privilege. I remember how I felt the first time I boarded a plane leaving Africa to return to the United States – how I felt like I was leaving a big part of myself behind. I know that that moment greatly defines who I am. Being involved with GYPA allows me to witness others experience that moment and then wait with great anticipation to hear about the incredible things those people do with their lives and the invaluable impact that they have on the lives of others.

Whitney gives me publicity :)

My incredibly supportive friend, Whitney Bull, sent Hamilton College the article in the East African Business Week (in previous post) and as a result, the following appeared on the Hamilton website. Although I was kind of embarassed by the article (and some of its false facts), it does feel good to be recognized. More importantly, however, is how good it feels to have friends who encourage me, show how much they care about me by asking questions, genuinely listening and caring about the answers, and then take it one step further by giving me publicity. :)

From the website, thanks to Whitney:

Katie Spencer '06 was featured in an article in East African Business Week - Kampala (2/26/07) about her volunteer work with the Global Youth Partnership for Africa (GYPA) and travel to Uganda, where she worked for 2 months.

Spencer started fulltime volunteer work for GYPA in August 2006. In January she co-led a GYPA trip of approximately 20 students to Uganda (including Meredith Falzone and Lynn Wetzel, both '07.) The purpose of the trip was to raise awareness about the conflict in Uganda and foster relationships between Ugandan and American Youth. Spencer remained in Uganda after the trip to pursue various other projects.

The Global Youth Partnership for Africa is a program that links American and African youth. According to its Web site, "In January 2007, 13 Americans and 23 Ugandans came together in Kampala and Gulu, Uganda for the second Global Kimeeza. The goal of the Kimeeza was to provide a platform for these young people to explore the important role that youth play in post-conflict reconstruction by sharing ideas, approaches, and strategies."

The East African Business Week article quotes Spencer: "The partnership provides an opportunity for mutual benefit. Ugandan youth meet with American youth and share experiences and the Americans help to link them up to people who can fund their activities," she says.

The following is an article that was published a few weeks ago in the East African Business Week on GYPA. Although Ben created a few facts (I was never a "research fellow" for the Corporate Council on Africa!), he wrote a great article that articulates the value of GYPA programs.

East African Business Week; Unveiling Opportunities

How Uganda, American youth syndicate could create jobs opportunities
Monday, 26 February 2007

By Ben Moses Ilakut

Before Katie Spencer, 22, visited Southern Africa about four years ago, her perception of Africa was probably not fully formed, but her first visit turned her childhood dreams about Africa into a life and career line. So when she returned home-Minesotta, USA, she started studying Health Development with a focus on Africa.

“Even as a child I was obsessed about Africa. Each time I did a child's project it was always this and that on Africa...this and that on African this and that...,” says Katie.

And when she completed school she worked at the Corporate Council on Africa as a research fellow on HIV Aids Policies in Africa.

This saw her do research work in Kenya first in 2004 for 4 months and again in 2005. It was about this time that Katie learnt about the Global Youth Partnership for Africa (GYPA), a programme that links American and African youth. She left her job and started fulltime volunteer work for GYPA in August 2006, then visited Uganda in January 2007.

Halle Butvin, 25, from Ohio USA, first came to Uganda in June 2006. A friend at the American University had sent her an e-mail describing GYPA.

Halle’s first impression of Uganda was the conflict in the northern part of the country. She then took to reading about the conflict from NGO websites and wire articles. Butvin is a financial manager in Washington DC at the American Institute for Research.

Each time she gets vacations she commits most of the time into working for GYPA. And her motivation: “I always wanted to do something in the area of international development.”

This January, Halle and Katie were among the 20 plus American youth who visited Uganda and descended on the streets of Gulu-face-to-face with Ugandan friends whom they only knew by name.

“Two weeks ago, you were just a list of names, but here now I am looking you in the eye and talking to you,” said Rebecca, one of the participants and website designer at a meeting at Makerere University Business in Kampala recently.

The Global Youth Partnership for Africa (GYPA) was born from Project Namuwongo Zone B (PNZB), a commuity based organisation legally registered in Uganda in October 2003 and co-founded by an American, Mr Jeremy M. Goldberg, then 22 years old and a Ugandan, Mr Joseph Bagambaki, then 33.

While working with a variety of college students in the United States, Germany, Israel and Uganda, the Namuwongo Zone leadership was re-empowered and sought to connect youth from other continents to understand the challenges of their counterparts in Africa.

According to GYPA cordinator Mr Josh Golstein, GYPA is premised on the understanding that youth of the world can engage in activities that support the people of other countries; and promote efforts to respond to the humanitarian issues facing the entire globe.

Katie entirely believes in this: “The partnership provides an opportunity for mutual benefit. Ugandan youth meet with American youth and share experiences and the Americans help to link them up to people who can fund their activities,” she says.

One youth who is bound to benefit from this interaction is Abraham Tekya (popularly known among Ugandan artistes as Abramz), 24.

Abramz is into socially conscious hip-hop music and dance, incorporating health messages to inspire youth to live economically active lives. He started the Break Dance Project Uganda in February 2006, largely inspired by a background of lack.

Having failed to continue school for lack of school fees, he deeply believed he would use talent to make a change in his life, and perhaps, change others.

The project uses break-dance as a tool for social change by bringing youth and children together to share ideas and create employment.

In November 2006, the project introduced another dance team in Gulu in northern Uganda. About 120 children are already attending break-dance classes in Gulu and trainers travel from Kampala to Gulu every month to impart skills to the post conflict teenagers.

And thanks to the French embassy, on March 23 some of the children will perform at the French Cultural Day at Ndere Centre in Kampala.

Now GYPA could open wider horizons for the group.

Says Abramz: “During the Second Global Kimeeza, a number of American youth visited us during training sessions and discussed the project with us and sharpened our perspective. Katie Spencer for example, documented our activities on CD slides. We use them for display and she has taken some to the US for advocacy and has promised to link us up with people who can help fund our activities.”

Already, says Abramz, some US students are organising fundraising activities at various universities to support the project.

The January 2007 visit by 13 Americans, and their coming in contact with over 23 Ugandans was a culmination into the Global Kimeeza, a word coined from Luganda.

In small groups, these youth worked together with regional experts to discuss youth as peacebuilders, justice and forgiveness, poverty relief and economic development. The two-week-long conference concluded with the Global Kimeeza II Action Statement, a document that serves both as a pledge to action for those who drafted it and as a model for other youth who are searching for ways to get involved in the reconstruction and reconciliation processes.

Kimeeza is the Luganda word for “big discussion table”. Most of the members are university students and those who have just started working.

GYPA youth have made various other attempts to bring meaning to the communities they have come in contact with.

GYPA has been syndicating an arrangement where crafts women in Namuwongo, a Kampala suburb find worthy US markets for their produce.

The women initiated a sustainable micro-finance programme, with support from the GYPA staff.

Many of them were driven from their homes in the north by the prolonged conflict and accompanying abuse of civilians. Many have only basic levels of education and few other resources at their disposal. HIV prevalence levels are high in this community, and women strive to earn money through various jobs to support themselves.

GYPA established an office where all the women do their hand work. Volunteers help them to develop their business projects: Some fashion jewelry out of paper beads, some weave cloth material, and others make dolls or table maps.

Halle and Katie think the crafts can fetch more money for the women if they marketed them online, a project that they would be willing to undertake by first designing a website for the women’s group.

But GYPA is a one sided bid, meant to benefit only Ugandans.

“It is mutual,” says Halle. “American scholars have too much theory; they need to contextualise their knowledge by coming face to face with peoples of the world, meet them, and talk to them so as to provide a context to their careers. When I return home I am going to influence many American youth to come here and make a contribution.”

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